Wearin' the Robes

What is the deal with women who get their hearts broken running to the Robes of Concealment?

I spoke with a slave today.  She had developed an attraction towards a man, and he had broken her heart.  She was determined that she wouldn't get hurt again, so she got a capitalized nick and adopted the role of a free woman.  I've seen this happen again, and again, and again.

Unfortunately, the protection that comes with the Robes of Concealment is only an illusion.  Taking the role of a free woman won't keep her or any other women from broken hearts or pain.  At the very least, she still is a woman, and she still is attracted to strong men, and they can still break her heart.

But the issue goes deeper than that.  What this slave came to realize as we talked is that there is absolutely nothing that she can do to avoid getting hurt.  Zero.  Loss is an inevitable part of life.  Conflict is an inevitable part of life.  Misunderstanding, and change, and mistakes are all an inevitable part of life.  And more often than not, these things carry with them pain.  Pain is an inevitable part of life.  It cannot be avoided.

What we can do, however, is choose to experience joy and love and passion in our lives in between and occasionally even during the pain.  We can enjoy sweetness with the bitterness.

Running away from life doesn't take the pain from us.  Our fleeing does take us away from joy.  Pain is a given, joy is a choice.

For a slave, joy and fulfillment come from living as a slave to the best of her ability.  Serving men, pleasing them, enjoying their pleasure in her.  What opportunity does a free woman have to do these things?  If anything, she must hide, must do them in secret, begging for discretion lest her dalliances be discovered.  What joy, what fulfillment is there in this?  Little, if any, and only mixed with bitterness at that.

By taking on the Robes of Concealment, this slave was unwittingly barring herself from her greatest source of joy, her slavery.  She realized this as we talked, and followed my suggestion to drop the case of her nick and go enjoy the world as she was meant to.  She was much happier as she left to go please men.




P.S.  By the way, there is a way to shift some of the pain out of a slave's relationship with men.  If she continues to serve and please many men as she becomes attracted towards one, it will season her attraction, drawing out her exposure to that man.  The more exposure she can have to a man before she begs his collar, the better she will know whether that man will be one in whose collar she can be fulfilled.  The better she knows this, the more her choices in that collar will lead to joy rather than pain.  Although the depth of each woman's surrender depends on her own nature, for each woman, "the shorter the pursuit, the shallower the collar."

How Should One Live?

Somehow, in the north, in Torvaldsland, I had changed. This I knew. There was a different Tarl Cabot than ever there had been. Once there had been a boy by this name, one with simple dreams, naive, vain, one shattered by a betrayal of his codes, the discovery of a weakness where he had thought there was only strength. That boy had died in the delta of the Vosk; in his place had come Bosk of Port Kar, ruthless and torn, but grown into his manhood; and now there was another, one whom I might, if I wished, choose to call again Tarl Cabot. I had changed. Here, with the Forkbeard, with the sea, the wind, in his hall and in battle, I had become, somehow, much different. In the north my blood had found itself, learning itself; in the north I had learned strength, and how to stand alone.

In the north I had grown strong. I suddenly realized the supreme power of the united Gorean will, not divided against itself, not weak, not crippled like the wills of Earth. I felt a surge of power, of unprecedented, unexpected joy. I had discovered what it was to be Gorean. I had discovered what it was, truly, to be male, to be a man. I was Gorean.

p439, Marauders of Gor [Gor Series Book 9]
John Norman

Nine books. It took nine books for Tarl Cabot to become a true Gorean. Four years living among Goreans (10,119-10,122 Contasta Ar) before he found himself. It took four years of living directly among them, even with Tarl's incredible capacity to learn, to discover the his true Gorean Nature.

I am taking that journey. And while I likely will not find myself in Ko-Ro-Ba or in the Sardar Mountains or in Port Kar, I am following in Tarl's footsteps. I look forward to the day of my Torvaldsland experience.

When Tarl first arrived on Gor (Tarnsman of Gor) he was taught by men who knew Gor. His father Matthew Cabot, the Scribe Torm, and the Warrior Older Tarl. These men provided Tarl with an excellent foundation of skills for, and knowledge and understanding of how to live as a Gorean Warrior. They taught him how to interact with others, what others expected of him, and how to function successfully as a Gorean in Gorean society. They trained him in the skills necessary to do so.

He continued to be taught by others in the nuances of warfare skills in their particular culture. Among the desert tribes (Tribesmen of Gor) he learned to fight with the scimitar. Here, in Torvaldsland he learned to fight with the axe.

And others taught him in the nuances of being a man, as well.  The Forkbeard teaches Tarl about being a man as they play Kaissa.

"You should not have surrendered your Ax," said Forkbeard.

"In not doing so," I said, "I would have lost the tempo, and position. Too, the Ax is regarded as less valuable in the end game."

"You play the Ax well," said Forkbeard. "What is true for many men may not be true for you. The weapons you use best perhaps you should retain."

I thought on what he had said. Kaissa is not played by mechanical puppets, but, deeply and subtly, by men, idiosyncratic men, with individual strengths and weaknesses. I recalled I had, many times, late in the game, regretted the surrender of the Ax, or its equivalent in the south, the Tarnsman, when I had simply, as I thought rationally, moved in accordance with what were reputed to be the principles of sound strategy. I knew, of course, that game context was a decisive matter in such considerations, but only now, playing Forkbeard, did I suspect that there was another context involved, that of the inclinations, capacities and dispositions of the individual player. Too, it seemed to me that the Ax, or Tarnsman, might be a valuable piece in the end game, where it is seldom found. People would be less used to defending against it in the end game; its capacity to surprise, and to be used unexpectedly, might be genuinely profitable at such a time in the game. I felt a surge of power.

pp95-96, Marauders of Gor [Gor Series Book 9]
John Norman

But Tarl didn't have a mentor, a guide for his journey of self-discovery. He made this journey into his nature on his own. He learned from other men; he listened to them, evaluated and weighed their advice, and chose to heed some and ignore others. But he had no mentor for his crusade of self-discovery. It was one he had to take on his own.

There were no maps for me.

I, Tarl Cabot, or Bosk of Port Kar, was torn between worlds.

I did not know how to live.

I was bitter.

But the Goreans have a saying, which came to me in the darkness, in the hall. "Do not ask the stones or the trees how to live; they cannot tell you; they do not have tongues; do not ask the wise man how to live, for, if he knows, he will know he cannot tell you; if you would learn how to live do not ask the question; its answer is not in the question but in the answer, which is not in words; do not ask how to live, but, instead, proceed to do so."

I do not fully understand this saying. How, for example, can one proceed to do what one does not know how to do? The answer, I suspect, is that the Gorean belief is that one does, truly, in some way, know how to live, though one may not know that one knows. The knowledge is regarded as being somehow within one. Perhaps it is regarded as being somehow innate, or a function of instincts. I do not know. The saying may also be interpreted as encouraging one to act, to behave, to do, and then, in the acting, the doing, the behaving, to learn. These two interpretations, of course, are not incompatible. The child, one supposes, has the innate disposition, when a certain maturation level is attained, to struggle to its feet and walk, as it did to crawl, when an earlier level was attained, and yet it truly learns to crawl, and to walk, and then to run, only in the crawling, in the walking and running.

The refrain ran through my mind. "Do not ask how to live, but, instead, proceed to do so."

But how could I live, I, a cripple, huddled in the chair of a captain, in a darkened hall?

I was rich, but I envied the meanest herder of verr, the lowest peasant scattering dung in his furrows, for they could move as they pleased.

I tried to clench my left fist. But the hand did not move.

How should one live?

pp18-21, Marauders of Gor [Gor Series Book 9]
John Norman

How should one live? This question reverberates through my own soul. As for Tarl, there are no maps charting the path to my Torvaldsland Experience.  Moreover I have no father, no Scribe, no Warrior to teach me.  To train me in the understanding and the skills of living as a Gorean Builder in my day-to-day life, to teach me how to function successfully as a Gorean in society, among those unGorean people that I come in contact with.

What is left to me? To take the journey of understanding, of skills, of self-discovery on my own; and "in the acting, the doing, the behaving, to learn." The wounds and the scars and the victories will be dear instructors.

Short Visits

Here is another bit I wrote for the website of #The_Golden_Goblet, where I have been spending time as an Op.  Again, this is still personal, and has not been made official.  It reflects my personal ideal of Gorean involvement on IRC, and does not necessarily reflect the opinions or positions of the owners of the channel.

It's amazing how some people go out of their way to make sure that their visits to #The_Golden_Goblet are brief. Their behavior, their choices, their words just scream, "I don't belong here! Get me out of here!" From the amount of effort they put into earning a kick and often a ban from the channel, it would seem to be a favorite pastime. Focused as we are on making the experience as fulfilling as possible for our patrons, we've decided to put together a list to help these people get what's coming to them as quickly as possible.

Unfortunately, we don't have rules for the Free that you can break. Our Ops have the latitude to kick or ban whomever they wish to, whenever they want, for whatever reason. In fact, they occasionally kick each other, just to stay in practice. However, here are some of the most effective ways to shorten your stay at #The_Golden_Goblet:

• Be fake. Make up a character that you adopt when you come onto IRC, and that you leave behind when you log off; be "online only". Have your online character make choices and do things that you would never do in real life. Kill people. Force collars on slaves. Describe yourself and your offline world in ways that aren't accurate. Say things that aren't true about yourself, your life, your history, or about other people.
• Treat Gor like a game. Trivialize the practices, the paradigms, the traditions of the people of Gor. Make snide comments about tarns and John Norman and paga serves, about what a man or a master or a slave is. Turn your connection to Gor on and off as it is convenient. Don't recognize the difference between having fun and mocking.
• Expect us to not judge you. Expect us to like you. Expect us to care, even though you're a stranger. Expect that we'll take you in, embrace you as a brother, and spill our guts to you before you've won the privilege. Expect us to change so that you aren't offended, or for your convenience. Get upset when we ignore you.
• Don't listen, don't learn. Enter into our space without taking the time to learn our traditions and expectations, or without caring about them. Talk without taking time to comprehend. Debate without taking time to consider. Tell us we're right or wrong without taking the time to understand us. Be interested solely in spending time with the slaves in the alcoves.
• Be a wimp or a coward. Don't stand behind your own opinions. Back off and even run when someone disagrees with you or attacks you or your position. Don't stand up for your beliefs. Insult people to avoid losing or even engaging. Be afraid to ask questions, to be imperfect, to have emotions. Patronize us. Be scared that we won't like you. Don't hold the slaves accountable. Be scared they won't like you. Worry about offending them. Let them manipulate you and tell you what to do, apologize to them. Be reluctant to say "No."
• Do things that make people's lives miserable. Be a pedophile, be abusive, be involved with drug abuse, be in IRC channels that promote these things. Be a gossip. Stalk people. Violate people's privacy or their online or offline boundaries.
• Be unable to communicate at an acceptable level. Don't speak English. Don't know how to use the basic functions of IRC. Likewise, don't follow the basic etiquette and protocol of IRC. Come to us to help you figure out technical problems that are disrupting the channel.

You're right. It does sounds like a lot of work. But each of these is a powerful tool that can drastically shorten your stay in #The_Golden_Goblet. Frankly, when you do these things we enjoy keeping your stay short just as much as you do. We hate it when our boots get dusty, and kicking patrons is a fun and exciting way to keep them clean. To keep the record straight, we'll usually let you know the reason when we kick you. Repeating that particular behavior when you return will almost guarantee you an even quicker exit, and possibly even earn you that treasured trophy, a ban.

Those of you who prefer a longer stay, however, will find that coming in, sitting back, listening and watching and learning will be key to prolonging your stay. If you find that the Gor we live appeals to you, spend some time reading the books. Read from the website. Ask a few questions. Start looking at your nature as a man, and how true you live to that nature. Spend some more time reading the books. Start living the things you're learning. Do this earnestly, and over time you may just possibly discover a friend or two among the patrons and Ops here.

Penned by Jennen

Real and Online

I've written the following piece for the website of a channel I've been spending time in recently as an Op on irc.bondage.com, called #The_Golden_Goblet.  It reflects my personal ideal of Gorean involvement on IRC.  As of yet it is still my personal work, and does not necessarily reflect the opinions or positions of the Owners of #The_Golden_Goblet.

When you first encounter #The_Golden_Goblet, you'll find that as a virtual Gorean paga tavern, this place is not much different from other Gorean IRC channels. The slaves here are more than eager to please and ready to be taken. If you are so inclined we have pretty much any food or drink you can imagine (although you may have to coach the newer girls with your more obscure requests). And if you're into discussion we can likely chew your ears off. But there's nothing new in that. Not many Gorean channels that would claim anything different.

What is different here is our purpose. For the patrons and Ops of #The_Golden_Goblet, the paga and the roast bosk and the dancing girls are just a part of a much larger picture. For us, the channel serves as a place to connect with real Goreans, a meeting place for hard men and soft women who have taken Gor from the page and from the screen and started living it in their lives, offline and away from the computer. And while it is definitely a place to have fun, it's also a place to talk and share and support, a place to learn and teach and mentor and study, a place to discover how to apply Gor to real life.

The men and women in this virtual paga den are very real when it comes to Gor. It's no longer just a fun thing to do on IRC; for the patrons and Ops here it has also become a guide for life. These people strive to be true to themselves, all the time. To build their lives on the foundation of concepts like "Being a Man" and "Ownership" and "Mastery". To take the concepts of Gor into their workplace, into their homes, into their hearts. These people strive to *be* Gorean Men and Women.

So, the people you find in this channel are real people. Real Goreans. The characters you see in channel are who we are offline. Take away the computers and the virtual accoutrements, the tospits and the sleen and the tarns, and you'll be left with hard men who fight to master their lives, and the women slaves who surrender to them. The choices we make in channel, are be the same choices we would make offline. And if you knew us online, you would be familiar with us offline. Because we are real.

If you choose to come among us, we'll expect you to be real, too.

Penned by Jennen